Weekend Vibes with Some Random Thoughts

Yay for the weekend! A few random thoughts for you on this Saturday!

1. We are getting our house cleaned by a professional cleaning company this week and I can not tell you how excited I am. It was actually a groupon we bought months ago for our townhouse and they had to reschedule and we ended up running out of time to use it. So guess what; I get to use it for our house....WOO HOO.

2. Finding new child care SUCKS! There really isn't a good way to put it. We are currently looking at getting a nanny and I am praying that it works out better than it did when Kinley was little! We are also preschool shopping again which is awful too! Kinley's school is only going to offer Monday - Friday next year and we are not ready for her to go all day every day!

3.My schedule at work will be changing in a few weeks and it is truly going to be bittersweet but I think will work out so much better for our family. I will be home for dinner and bedtime in the evenings and off on weekends. Sometimes it is really hard balancing it all and being a working mom. I am trying to embrace it but some days it just makes me sad!

4. The weather has been hit or miss the past week or so but when it is a hit we are soaking up all the fresh air possible. There is something to be said about getting some fresh air!

5. I have decided on Zander's first birthday and am SOOOOO excited for it! Now if my family could just fly out and join us!

6. Some people are so draining and will constantly be that way! Surround yourself with positive people and positive energy.

7. Why do the weekends go so fast!!!

I hope everyone has a great weekend! We have a busy rest of the day and super busy Sunday! Happy Weekend!

9 Random Thoughts

I haven't had a lot of time to write any long posts lately so I am going to share a few random thoughts I have had lately.

1. I hate my long work days. I love being off 3 days but the 12 hour days are pretty killer. Poor Matt has the kids 3 nights a week alone. It is the hardest part of the day and I hate that I can not be there with everyone. Sometimes being a working mom sucks!

2. Do what works for your family. I have always done what is best for our family and I will continue to do so. I don't care what other people think (ok I do a little) but I will still do what is best for my family. Quite judging and be supportive people!

3. I am ready for fall weather and to take Kinley and Zander to all the fall festivals. I will be even more excited when Zander can understand what is going on. This year should be fun though with Kinley excited about so many things.

4. Being a mom of 2 is hard. The days I work I don't get home until 7pm and it is difficult. Kinley is ready for bed and Zander has been in bed and usually wakes up. I have 1800 things to do and want to eat dinner. Thankfully it is only 3 days a week but it is a real struggle. Besides that struggle taking care of 2 kiddos is just hard. You moms with more than 2 are amazing!

5. I need to get back to working out. Again work days makes it really difficult to get work outs in. I need to get back to at least getting them in on days off and then hopefully when we start sleeping again I can get up early to workout.

6. Flying with an almost 3 year old and a 7 month is going to be interesting. We flew when Zander was a few months and it wasn't too difficult, though now that he is more active it is going to be a little more challenging I think. Plus the flight is about double. Send tips!

7. I want a date night with my husband. I miss him. We never see each other and it is tough. We have one day off together and it is so crazy I barely see him then either. Our anniversary is coming up so I am hoping a date is in our future!

8. I really need to start planning Kinley's birthday. How in the world is she going to be 3! We are going to have an ice cream social party and I am so excited to see how it comes together. Zander might get his first taste of ice cream a little early :). Oh the things you do with your second child.

9. I booked our Christmas pictures and I am super excited! The kids will have pictures with Santa too! Let's hope they actually sit on his lap. A few pictures from a few years ago because I love them so much!

Our Year in Review

Well this isn't too late :). We are still technically in the first week of the month. We had a pretty amazing year in 2015 and are definitely excited about what 2016 is going to bring us. For now though...our 2015 review.

January

We enjoyed a quiet new years day in as a family.

Kinley went to her first gym class at the Little Gym. She definitely loved it but to be honest it was a little expensive in my opinion for a one year old.

February

We had quite a few fun snow days in February which gave us some much needed family time. We baked home made cookies and Kinley enjoyed eating all the chocolate chips. This was her first taste of sweets. She was a fan!

My mom came and as always we had such a blast! Of course it was too short but we look forward to her coming again soon when baby boy arrives.

Kinley had strep again (and our nanny quit) which was not exciting, but I do love all the cuddles! I know someday she is going to not want to snuggle with me.

March

Matt and I enjoyed a wonderful date night which does not happen often enough. That is one of my goals for the new year to have more dates!

Kinley started daycare at an in home that we LOVE! We are so thankful for Ms. E after having such struggles with a nanny. I truly believe everything happens for a reason and this was a huge blessing to us.

Kinley had her first swimming experience. What a blast! She loved it!!

I celebrated turning 33 with my two favorite people and it could not have been better! I also started a new job that I really enjoy.

April 

April was defintiely bittersweet for me. I stopped breastfeeding Kinley. After starting my new job it was just teh right timing. I still miss it and am very excited to breastfeed this baby boy. Kinley and I had quite the journey.

We celebrated a great Easter with Matt's family. His grandparents came to visit later in April which we always enjoy as well.

Kinley enjoyed her first carnival. She rode the train and went down the big slide with mommy.

May

We had our first zoo trip and ended up buying season passes. Kinley loves animals and we knew we would get back often. We didn't get as much as we liked but hopefully a few more times before baby boy comes.

Kinley and I traveled to Colorado for my sister's wedding shower. We had a great time spending some time at my nephew's baseball games and hanging out with family.

We took Kinley strawberry picking for the second year in a row and she was all about it this year. She picked the berries right off and ate away. Good thing I brought a spray bottle to clean them :).

June

Kinley went to the beach for the first real time. She has been before but not where she could get in the water and enjoy it. She did not want to leave.

We all traveled back to Colorado for my sister's wedding. I was the matron of honor and Kinley was the flower girl. She did amazing and we all had a fantastic time. Here are some tips for traveling with a toddler.

We got back from Colorado and Matt and I enjoyed an adult wedding of our two friends Chelsea and Tony. It was a much needed night out.

Matt celebrated his last father's day to an only child. Little did he know :).

July

I wrote one of my most popular posts. 3 car seat myths busted. If you have been following me for a while or know me you know car seat safety is a passion of mine.

Had some beach family pictures done by the amazing Lori Woodhouse Photography. I was quite frustrated with the windy evening we had but of course we ended up with some priceless memories.

We took a road trip up to Baltimore to see a wonderful friend of mine, Erin. Kinley and Bodie are only a few months apart and are the cutest when they are together. We don't get to see them often but we try for at least once a year.

Kinley graduated from her first story time class at the library. She was so proud.

I really started to embrace life as a working mom around this time. It is hard work but over all very rewarding for me. I hope the rest of us working moms will learn to embrace their role too.

August

Another beach trip in the books. This time we headed down to the Outer Banks where my step mom and her family were. I wish we could've stayed longer. Hoping they make another trip this year.

Kinley enjoyed her first ice cream eating experience.

Kinley got strep yet again. But this time it really made me thankful for the midnight screams. It is so sad when your children are sick.

September

The big announcement. Kinley is going to be a BIG SISTER!! We could not be more excited for our family.

Deciding on some must haves for baby #2 and letting go of the mommy guilt.

October

We closed on our first house as a married couple. We owned the townhouse, still do, but did not purchase that together. This house is ours and couldn't be more special.

Matt and I celebrated 4 wonderful years of marriage. It has been the best.

Kinley went trick or treating for real for the first year and jumped in many piles of leaves. We also had a blast at the pumpkin patch this year.

November

We celebrated another friend's beautiful wedding. Yay for another date!

Kinley turned 2!!! Wow time flies! I also took that time to reflect back on her, my first born, and how much I love her.

Had some more amazing family photos done. I was sure this time we were not getting any good ones. Kinley threw up on the way there and the entire shoot she fussed and clinged to me! Come to find out the poor girl had an ear infection. BUT....of course there were some amazing photos.

December

We did a few family holiday activities, looking at lights and making cookies were the highlights. We also found out that our baby girl was really a baby boy. Boy what a shocker!

Celebrated an amazing holiday with my mom here and Matt's family. My dad and step mom were even able to come visit for a day.

We ended the year on the couch with a movie and in bed by 10pm. Exciting life we lead I tell you, but I wouldn't change it for the world! Goodbye 2015!

We are so exited to see what 2016 brings us and our family! We know one thing is for sure we will be adding an amazing boy to our family.

Letting Go of the Guilt

Ahhh it is Tuesday already and Monday is over with WOO HOO.  I survived another day. That has been my motto lately.

A couple posts back I was telling you all how we were struggling with sleep. You can read about it here. Well let me tell you it has still been a struggle. I don't know what is going on. A few weeks ago she had strep and ever since then we haven't been able to get back to where we were. We use to be able to put her in bed awake, cover her up and leave. She would sleep until about 6:30 the next morning.

The weird thing is she is still napping in her bed fine. No issues at all. She doesn't even fight me. Lays right down and lets me cover her up. Now when it comes to bedtime it is a different story. As soon as we are done with stories she starts fussing. I still do the same thing. I put her in her bed and attempt to cover her up, then I leave. 9 nights out of 10 she is crying. That is so hard for me, it breaks my heart! I don't want her last memory of the day to be me walking out of the room while she is crying for me. But I do it anyways. This is where the guilt starts.

I go take a shower and hope and pray she quiets down by the time I am done. Some nights she is some nights she is still screaming. If she is still screaming I go back in and have her lay down and tell her it is bedtime, sweet dreams, I love her and I will see her in the morning. She usually will lay down this time. So we are good for a few hours. Then the crying starts. We do start out there and try our hardest to stay there, but it just doesn't work :(.

The other night it was about 9:15pm. I went in and she laid down and I was able to leave. She was quite for about 5 minutes. I let her cry for a little and the screaming continued. I went back in and she laid down again and I told her I was right there and she was ok. I stood outside her room and she was quiet. I walk very carefully through our room, not trying to creak the floor, and climb back into bed. At this point it is 9:45p and after the past few nights we have had I am ready to go to sleep. 20 minutes go by and the screaming starts again. What is going on? So we do the same thing over again. This is on repeat until I can't take anymore and she ends up in our bed. Then we all sleep peacefully through the rest of the night. The end you think right? No I have so much guilt with her sleeping in my bed and I need to let it go. It is ok!

I have been trying so hard to be strong and keep her in her bed but honestly I can't take it anymore. When you have gotten maybe 2-3 hours of sleep for many nights in a row the endless screaming gets to you. I am human. I work full time, take care of a toddler and attempt to be a good wife to my husband. Insert more guilt here because I have not been the best wife or mom.

This has been very trying for Matt and I. We are tired and when you are sleep deprived you tend to get frustrated easier and snap faster. There have been many nights Matt and I have not been nice to each other all because of frustration and sleep deprivation. Is that an excuse, NO, but it is reality. The other morning I apologized to him for being mean at 2:00am and just hugged him and cried. This is so hard for me. And let me be honest as I type this tears are forming in my eyes. I am having a hard time with this sleep regression if that is what you want to call it.

I have found myself explaining our situation to many of my friends lately trying to justify her sleeping in our bed and why we end up with her in our bed. I am beginning to realize I don't need to justify what I do as a parent and why I do it. I am not harming my daughter and in reality I am probably helping all of us sleep by letting her sleep with it. Getting frustrated and being sleep deprived does anyone no good. It makes for days wasted on crankiness. These two are my world and I hate wasting days due to crankiness and frustrations.

At this point we are going to do what ever we need to do so all of us can get some sleep. I am going to try to stop feeling guilty about putting her in my bed and be thankful we are getting sleep. Being a mom/parent is very hard. Everyone will tell you something different. Shoot one person told me to put ear plugs in my ears and let her scream. I am sorry I just can't do that! And I refuse. If that is what works for you go for it. If I have learned one thing about being a mom, it is that you have to do what works for you in the moment. This moment will pass and there will be something else that is difficult to deal with. This is parenthood! It is a roller coaster.

My sister said something to me yesterday while I was telling her what was going on and it made me think. She said, "I think this habit can be changed in the future when she's older to understand so right now sleep is definitely more important than having her sleep in your bed." She is right. We create different habits everyday good and bad. This could be good or for some people I am sure they see it as bad. But right now this is a good habit for us because we are all sleeping. So I am going to quit feeling guilty about her sleeping in our bed and enjoy the sleep we will be getting. Judge away people, I am letting go of this guilt :). So for now this sleeping beauty will be sleeping with us.

Oh and on a happy note!!! We have put an offer on a house and it was accepted!! WOO HOO!!!! I know all you are jumping up and down for us if you have been reading about our frustrations with that. There is more here, here and here.  We have the inspection set for Friday! Hoping everything goes great and we are good to go! Keep us in your thoughts !

Hope everyone has a great Tuesday and this week flies by! I am ready to be off on Monday and spend some much needed time with some missed friends! It feels like forever since I have seen them.

Scenes from the Weekend

I am always a day or two late with these weekend updates! But in my defense I have had quite the busy weekend. If you read my last post you would know Kinley had strep so we've been dealing with that and the past two days Matt hasn't felt good either.

So lets say my weekend (Thursday and Friday) consisted of many toddler snuggles and Curious George. I really really don't like Kinley to watch a lot of TV but when you have a fever of 104 for a few days that kiddo gets whatever she needs. I think she will be OK watching TV for 2 days! It's all about balance remember! Read more about that here. At least I tell myself that!

Friday afternoon we went house hunting again. No such luck.....again! I am really trying to tell myself to be patient and the right house will come but it is discouraging. Honestly we have only seen 9 houses so I am sure there are many more in our future. But when your realtor sends a list of 75 houses and you only want to go see 6 you feel defeated. We saw a few that we liked but none we absolutely love. I just won't spend that much money on something we don't love. It will come it will! After house hunting we enjoyed some yummy Chick Fil A. I rarely ever eat fast food but it was 5:30 and the in laws had Kinley and there was not time to cook dinner. It was tasty though! She was starting to feel a little better and loved the horse my in laws got her.

Saturday I worked all day like usual but it went by pretty fast. Matt did a lot of fixing up at the house with the help of his parents. There was some much needed TLC that needed to be done. We have had some bites on renters so we want to be prepared. We are going house hunting again this week so please please wish us luck!! The rest of the evening was spent watching some Teen Mom and to bed early! I was looking forward to sleeping in my bed without a toddler on top of me. Don't get me wrong I love her cuddles but she is not fun to sleep with.

Sunday we went over to Matt's parents for brunch and enjoyed the beautiful day. Kinley loves blowing bubbles with poppy and checking out her pumpkins that are getting massive! I think they are going to be done way before Halloween. Matt wasn't feeling well when we got home so he took a nap and actually didn't get up for the rest of the night. I put Kinley down for a nap and ran to the grocery store. Sometimes it is wonderful to go to the grocery store alone! I like to grab some Starbucks but it was getting late in the day so I try not to have any caffeine so I skipped this time. I got home and all the groceries put away and decided what I was going to make so I had dinner for the next day.

Kinley woke up and Matt still wasn't feeling well. So I put Kinley to work helping me prepare Stuffed pepper casserole. She loves taking one bite out of the veggies and then putting them back LOL. Don't tell anyone there might have been half bitten veggies in the casserole. Hey you will never know because I chopped them all up in the Ninja! It turned out really good and will be eating it again for lunch tomorrow. And Kinley even took a bite! WIN!!! This child of mine is so picky!! I hope this stage passes soon!

When we were done we headed up to the park for a little. Of course she had to have the baby with the stroller. Thankfully she left the picnic basket behind this time. Surprisingly she pushed the stroller all the way to the park and then took the baby out for a swing in the swings. She wasn't too interested in pushing it back home so while carrying her and pushing her mini stroller we made it home. I was sweating, she was sweating, the baby was sweating! Oh wait maybe that was my sweat that dripped on the baby. Gross :)

I prepared another dinner for the nights dinner. I made chicken breast covered with cream of mushroom soup mixed with Lipton Onion soup mix. It wasn't my favorite. It was a little too salty for me. After getting everything cleaned up it was bath time for Kinley. Oh did I mention I had to feed Kinley dinner while she played with play dough. Dang this child of mine!

After she was in bed I thought I was going to be able to relax for a little after cleaning up her toys and the dishes that I didn't get to. Well it was for a little until she started screaming at 815. I don't know what was up with her besides wanting me to stay in her room and hold her or stand by her bed. She never lets my husband go into her room  at night. She screams worse. And has always been like this. It makes my patience wear very fast. She really knows how to doubt my skills as a mother. That went on until about 930 when she finally laid down. She always asks to eat. I know it is a stalling tactic because I always offer her something and she eats about 4 puffs. I really don't know what else to do! If you have any ideas please share!! Besides letting her scream until she passes out I don't know what else to do. Parenthood is always challenging and testing my limits!

I hope everyone had a great weekend and your week is off to a great start!

Embracing Life as a Working Mom

When I first went back to work I had the worst guilt ever. I cried driving to work, I cried going to sleep at night because I felt so guilty about going to work. I hated the fact that I was not able to stay home with my baby girl all day long. I was jealous of the SAHMs. I was so sad I would miss out on important milestones that other's would get to witness. I was her mom I should be able to be there for EVERYTHING! Needless to say the best decision for our family was for me to work. So that is what I did. I felt guilty and frustrated that others were judging me because I was not sacrificing other things in life to be able to stay home. Though they really have no idea the sacrifices I was making. Don't people know being a new mom is hard enough and there is no reason to be so judgemental. People really don't understand that do they. It is so very sad to me, us moms need to be supportive of each others decisions and stand by one another.

Us women need to stop being so critical of others and embrace others decision, learn from one another. I would venture to say men aren't judging each other for working and providing for their families. Or talking behind each other's back because they didn't make that cake from scratch or because they were not able to attend the play date due to work. This list goes on and on. Stop judging people! One of my favorite sayings, "You don't know what goes on behind closed doors." You don't know why people make the decisions they make.

Let's fast forward a year and a half. WOW have I really been back at work a year and a half already? I am sure I am still judged for making the decision to work, but that is ok, because at this point I am 100% proud of my decision to work. We have gone through many changes as a family and I have been lucky to start a new job in the process that has benefited our family greatly. At this point I can proudly say I don't have much mom guilt when I go to work anymore. Do I miss my daughter? Of course! I miss her so very much. It doesn't mean I love her any less because I choose to work. And yes that is a choice. I am a firm believer that everyone has choices in life and I choose to work because it is the best decision for our family and I'll be honest; financially me being a SAHM isn't in the cards right now, but if it was I don't think I would choose to do that full time. I would choose to work.

Working, like being a mom, gives me a purpose. I feel needed, wanted and expected, by my husband and my daughter. It gives me a sense of contribution and accomplishment. I also love giving my daughter the opportunity to spend time with her grandparents that she wouldn't get if I was a SAHM. I love being able to give her the space to grow as an individual without me by her side 24/7. She has learned being independent is a good thing.

I am proud to be a working mom! I feel that working and taking pride in having my own interests and goals sets an important example for my daughter. It teaches her that being independent is a good thing. A much needed attribute in today's society. I also feel working and missing her so much makes me a better mom. It makes me really optimize my time with her and cherish every moment I have with her and my husband. I am truly thankful.

It is nice to be able to put on some dress clothes and do my makeup and have adult interactions. Don't get me wrong, I love my yoga pants and no make up days, but there is something to be said about how putting on real clothes and make up makes you feel. Sometimes like a million bucks. The hardest part about being home for 12 weeks was the lack of adult interaction. I enjoy an adult conversation once in awhile that isn't asking my husband when she pooped or how much she didn't sleep throughout the day and how I need a break. We all need breaks, we are humans; we get frustrated and lonely and it is nice to get out once in a while. It is ok!

Lastly work gives me an identity outside of being a mom. If I ever wanted anything in life it was to be a mommy. Though I also got a Bachelors Degree and then a Master's Degree for a reason. I wanted to teach my children ( yes that is plural for a reason, someday there will me more) something. I am proud to be able to teach my child that everyone has a responsibility to contribute to the family. I strongly believe I am doing the best for my child with helping her embrace independence with the support of the best husband ever! I wouldn't be able to do it without him and we know we are making the best choices for our family.

Being a mommy will always be the most important job in my world but I am proud to be a working mom and I am going to embrace every second of it, even on the bad days.

Clearly my daughter is not lacking love or anything else for that matter.

Family photos done by Lori Woodhouse Photography, LLC. 

What No One Tells You About Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is HARD!! No one wants to tell you the struggles breastfeeding brings; the cracked bleeding nipples, pain when the baby eats, pain when you are pumping every 2-4 hours to make enough milk, the amount of dedication it takes to continue, the numerous times quitting went through my head, the list could go on. Now don't get me wrong, I loved being able to breastfeed my child for 17 months but it didn't come easy. It took a lot of tears, support, dedication and perseverance! I'm by no means judging anyone that chooses not to breastfeed their child or just simply can't. Everyone's journey is different. This is ours!

I choose to breastfeed our child and I wasn't giving up. It was something that was extremely important to me so we were gonna make it work, tears and all!

I want moms to know that it isn't always as natural as they say. Put the baby on the boob, they latch, suck and you are good to go! Well it wasn't that smooth for us! 

That being said, I'm very thankful Kinley latched at the beginning as well as she did. We had a c section so sometimes that doesn't happen. I didn't get to be the first to hold my baby, she didn't get placed on my chest immediately. They showed her to me then took her away and stitched me up. We didn't get to have skin to skin until I was in recovery. And honestly I don't even know how long that was after she was born. But when I did get her she latched and we had a very memorable first breastfeeding experience. 

She did absolutely amazing breastfeeding in the hospital. We decided it was best to have her in the nursery at night and requested she be brought back to us every 2 hours for feedings. After 15 hours of labor, pushing for 5 hours, ending in a c section and the huge amount of blood loss I had during the surgery I knew if I was going to heal she needed to be in the nursery. They were wonderful and brought her to us when she needed to be fed, then they took her back to the nursery. It was perfect! Then she spent all day with us :). 

My milk came in on day 3 and after we got home Kinley continued to do well breastfeeding. Me not so much!! I was in so much pain! I thought it was normal though so we kept going. She was gaining weight and getting what she needed so I wasn't about to quit. Let me be honest though, it crossed my mind many many times. It was tough! I was exhausted! I was hormonal! I was in pain from the c section! Giving up would've been so much easier! It was not in my future though! I knew deep down that wasn't what I wanted and I knew that wasn't what was best for all of us! 

We continued to breastfeed every 2-3 hours for many many months!!! Remember she didn't sleep through the night until 13 months :)  

I started pumping when she was about a month old. I was determined to get a stash going for when I went back to work. 

You exclusive pumping moms are my  heroes! I hated pumping! It hurt me so bad!! I tried many different size flanges and different levels on my pump. It didn't matter. It hurt! Remember all those bags I had to take to work to make pumping happen! It was crazy!

Looking back I probably pumped a little too often but I was so worried about not having enough milk in the freezer when I went back to work. If I wasn't feeding her I was pumping! Wow was it exhausting! If she slept more than 3 hours at night I was still getting up to pump. There was no missed feeding/pumping sessions. 

Now things did get easier and we got into a groove with her eating. But at 6 months a friend finally talked me into seeing a lactation consulatant because I was still in extreme pain. From what I've heard lactation consultants are amazing! Our luck wasn't like that. She basically told me since we were 6 months in there was no changing anything. What a disappointment, but I wasn't letting that stop me! 

We did find out she had thrush and a LOT of milk build up on her tongue so that was part of the reason for my pain. It took a long time to get that under control but I think once we finally did we got into a good groove and for the most part I was pain free while she ate. Pumping was a different story! We still weren't quitting! We had made it this far, we were going to keep going! 

I'm not writing this post to deter moms from breastfeeding in no way shape or form. I want this to inspire people that you can keep going! It's tough! It's a journey that's not all butterflies and rainbows! I would do it again in a heartbeat! The outcome and the benefits in the end are so rewarding. I would take that pain for 6+ months anyday to get to where we did! 17 months of breastfeeding! I'm proud! 

I owe many thanks to my husband who offered countless words of encouragement and many sleepless nights of support. He's my rock! He was one of the only people who encouraged me to keep going. He knew I didn't want to quit so if he could help me in any way he was going too. He knew it was important to me, so it was important to him as well! If he thought stopping would've made me happy he would've supported that decision. 

I finally stopped pumping around 13 months and it was amazing! When I first went back to work I was pumping 4 times a day and exclusively breastfeeding her. I slowly cut out one pumping session which made the weaning process for me so much easier. My boobs thanked me too. It definitely was helpful to wean gradually and slowly. I was never in pain when we weaned. 

What an amazing journey breastfeeding was for us! I wouldn't change it for the world! Good luck to all the breastfeeding mommies out there! It's tough but one of my most rewarding accomplishments ever! 

I hope this inspires you mommies to never give up! If that's your choice! 17 months later...full of attitude! I love this little girl more than anything!

A Day in the Life of a Working Mama

Well Ive been back at work a month now so I thought I would write a post on being a working mama! It was very hard to go back and I miss Kinley so much during the day. It's been tough to be up 2-3 times in the night and still function at work and then at home with her in the evening. But we are making do and I am loving every minute of it. It's a long day but nothing a cup or two of coffee doesn't get me through.

6:15am - Get up and shower as quietly as possible. She is still in our room right now and I swear she hears everything and wants to get up with mama. There have been many mornings I push snooze until 6:30 but I try to get up at 6:15.

6:35 am - Tip toe out of our room and go down stairs to dry and straighten my hair. Hook up the pump because I won't get to pump again until 10:00 and that makes for some sore boobs! Put on some makeup as I hear Matt and Kinley get up.

7:03 am - Change Kinley and enjoy her smiley face. I am amazed at how smiley this girl is in the morning despite being up so often and not sleeping very late. She is one happy girl. Seeing her smiles in the morning makes it all worth getting up in the middle of the night. Feed her and enjoy the last little bit I get with her before going to work.

7:34 am - Throw together some lunch, usually dinner from the night before. Pack up the bottles I need for pumping and all the pump parts. I carry so many bags to work they make fun of me. One day I forgot half my pump parts at home and had to come back and get them. Good thing I work only 7 minutes away.

7:47 am - Brew coffee. This is a MUST! I have come to love coffee even more since becoming a mommy. I don't have more than 2 cups a day but I love it! I find myself going to bed thinking about my coffee the next morning.

7:50 am - Soak up some last minute snuggles with my love bug before heading out the door for work.  Kiss Matt and the girl and I'm off.

8:05 am - Check emails and get ready for the day. The mornings are crazy busy at work and my 10:30 pumping session comes fast.

10:36 am - Pack up my bags and off to pump. I pump for 20 minutes looking through pictures of Kinley.

12:00 pm - Lunch! I am thankful we have lunch built into our day or I don't think I would ever get a chance to eat. I try to snack throughout the day because I want to make sure I am getting enough calories while breastfeeding.

2:30 pm - Off to pump again for 20 minutes while enjoying the pictures Matt sends me throughout the days. Sometimes I even get videos and I love them so much!

4:00 pm - I am out the door and headed home to see my baby girl!

4:15 - 6:00 pm - Sometimes I try to get her down for a small nap depending on how her day went. If she doesn't go down, which is about 90% of the time we play and go for walks.

6:02 pm - Start dinner while talking to Kinley. She loves being in her bouncy seat watching me make dinner.

7:00 pm - Bedtime routine starts with a bath. Kinley loves the bath and I think could stay in the water forever. It is such a great time with her smiling and talking. After bath we do lotion and pjs. Mood depending on story time. She eats and then I put her in the rock and play. She usually falls right asleep until..

7:56 pm - 45 minutes later she is up. Happens every time she goes down. This 45minute intruder is killer and the struggle starts to get her back to sleep for the night. This is anywhere from a 1-2 hour battle. By that time I am beat and ready for bed myself.

10:04 pm - Brush my teeth and get into bed. I know she will be up soon to eat again. We are experiencing 4 month sleep regression and she is up every 3-4 hours now.

12:10 am - Kinley is up to eat. I feed her and put her right back down.

3:17 am - Up to eat again. This is definitely taking a toll on me. She usually goes right back down but there have been a few nights where she doesn't and we are up until 5 or 530.

4:03 am - Back to sleep for a few hours until it starts all over again.

I love my baby girl so so much but I am really looking forward to getting more than 3-4 hours of sleep at a time.

Happy Hump Day!!